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Tuesday, May 22, 2018

Dylan singing about my city I live in now, Duluth - his place of birth

Bob Dylan will be 77 on May 24th, 2018
Something there is about you
Something there is about you that strikes a match
 in meIs it the way your body moves or is it the way your hair blows free?
Or is it because you remind me of something that used to be
Somethin' that crossed over from another century?
Thought I'd shaken the wonder and the phantoms of my youth
Rainy days on the Great Lakes, walkin' the hills of old Duluth.
There was me and Danny Lopez, cold eyes, black night and then there was Ruth 
Something there is about you that brings back a long-forgotten truth.
Suddenly I found you and the spirit in me sings
Don't have to look no further, you're the soul of many things.
I could say that I'd be faithful, I could say it in one sweet, easy breath
But to you that would be cruelty and to me it surely would be death.
Something there is about you that moves with style and grace
I was in a whirlwind, now I'm in some better place.
My hand's on the saber and you've picked up the baton
Somethin' there is about you that I can't quite put my finger on.
Songwriters: Bob Dylan

Everything is resolved

All the stress from yesterday evaporated.
My Minnesota tax return is in the 3rd stage of processing and I should have it by Friday or Monday this weekend.
The insurance adjuster appraiser came out today and looked at my car following a phone call from our company insurance agent in Philadelphia.
My article about Bob Dylan for Dylan fest in Duluth will be in the local paper this Friday.

I rule!!!

Once again, Janessa conquers with the help and grace of God who gave me an insightful mind.

Monday, May 21, 2018

North Korean episode and primary source from South Korea interviewed on Radio

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/tabernaclefaith/2018/05/21/a-professor-from-south-korea-will-discuss-northsouth-korea

My friend, Wade, whom I have known since 2000, was a spccial guest on my radio show tonight.  We were very close friends from 2000-2004.  We were roommates with eachother and 3 other friends in Panorama City.  It was a good time in my life.  Loran was only ages 4-6 during this time (2002-2004) while we lived with him.  

He lived in South Korea 9 years and taught at a university there.  He spoke of cultural exposure to the South Korean culture.  I asked him to be on the show due to his proximity to North Korean and his perspective living in South Korea.

Our discussion also evolved to immigration, Aaron Schlossberg's outburst that went viral.  We discussed charter schools, choices, teaching English to foreign transplants in K-12 and more.

It doesn't seem worth it

I don't know why but the stresses of my life keep piling up and I am losing faith in the outcome.  My tax refund is 2 weeks late.  It has been 4 weeks and 1 day since I filed the state taxes.  Feds were done expeditiously.  A staff hit my car at work on May 5th and due to a number of delays including abrasive decision making by management, my car is still not fixed after 17 days and I am still waiting on the insurance company my company contracts with to make the initial call about the situation.  I have voiced my concerns and complaints and by having an area of concern about my electrical system on my car. It delayed the process further.  People say to let go, let God.  I come from a family stock in which one tries to solve their own problems first. 

These two major issues, coupled with other things that seem out of control, make me take a wild spin over the weekend and cut loose between a 24 hr shift and an 8 hour shift.  I did not have the room or energy for such impulsive decisions but I did so anyway.  I was anonymous, contentious and irresponsible.  I did not drink, I engaged in another outlet. 

Pretty soon my school job will be over for the summer and I can fully relax.  I work 12 hour overnight job and then get 2 hours off before I have to be at the school.  That includes two 10 mile drives and a bath/shower.  

I also had a recent strain with an ex boyfriend whom I am now friends with again.  In many ways, we never ironed out of problems in the past.  I let him off the hook too easy.  In a recent conflict, I was suspicious of his recent activity.  He recently quit a job where he worked with my son and I think he is back with a woman who was very taxing on him.  I don't mind but he feels the need to lie to me about it.  I really cannot tell, but I know I don't feel comfortable pressing him for the truth.  I was going to write him another goodbye letter tonight and I still may.   On a good note, I can trust the people in my Gambler anonymous group for support.

I don't want to be dependent on money, present or future.  I want to be fully self sustaining on my paychecks alone.  All 4 now.

Sunday, April 29, 2018

Louis Farrakhan preaching on Rodney King incident.


The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan delivered this historic message at Southern University in Baton Rouge, Louisianna on May 9, 1992.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x6b09aXynJ8

This Muslim preacher is talking about the order of the universe and how even when things are in chaos, they are ordered.  However, I disagree with one statement.  When white man willingly oppresses the Black man as in the Los Angeles Rodney King case,  the order of the universe is disrupted because man is choosing an evil path that he could refrain from.  The white police officers could have avoided mistreating Rodney King.  Sin and disgrace can be avoided by the will of man.

The Outcome of the Alton Sterling murder by two police officers Live Radio Broadcast on YouTube- TUNE IN


Alton Sterling conclusion

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rL97EJ6qhrQ

Find more Political Gravity Episodes at BlogTalk radio link
There was backhanded justice in the Alton Sterling case. One police got suspended, one got fired. Not enough. Supposedly, the suspended officer got lectured for his anger management issues. The Baton Rouge police chief did the best he could with no cooperation from D.A. office. Alton Sterling was not a threat as a citizen to the general public. The 911 call was misleading and he never had a gun. We discuss gun rights and assertion by individuals regarding the Constitution. 00:15 Intro Song 3:49 Topic Introductions, US Attorney Resignation – Dana Boente 7:48 Alton Sterling, MLK Assassination, Problems with Constitution 12:43 Second Amendment, ERA, Militia, Gun Ownership Discussion 37:00 Alton Sterling

New Christian music by Jon Yoder.



Thursday, March 15, 2018

Flashback from my gypsy life, published in 2014 in Duluth Reader





I didn’t come from the mountains of Romania, but most of my life I have been a traveling gypsy.  I liked to run…from my problems, as an athlete and as a way to navigate the world.  I was a state champion runner but I had the personality of a vagabond, lining my soul with writers like Carson McCullers, Flannery O’Connor and Truman Capote.  This love affair with Southern Goth genre cultured my path into an eternal destiny of wandering, looking for things under rocks where others fear to tred.  My childhood friend who I walked from K to 12th grade married her high school sweetheart at age 21.  She lives in her former parent’s house and has two fine children.  She most likely planned her life.   I have left the Midwest at least 4 times in a 20 year period and managed to come back.  I have amnesia when it comes to snow.   My reunion with Minnesota soil this time was breached with record breaking winters two times in a row and a quiet horizon which begged my mind for one encounter with the homeless L.A. population just for company.  I could not adjust from L.A. back to Minnesota after a 13 year escape from the land o’ lakes.   While interviewing for the job that led me back to Minnesota, I stayed with my brother’s best friend, John, in Mc Gregor.   He was overly plump in his farmer bibs, divorced, a former educator in Minnesota prisons and a jolly good soul with a gift of hospitality.  He made me feel at home.  My interview was one week before the famous Duluth flood of June, 2012 sending pre-rapturous vibrations which may have been clueing me in not to take the job.  I remember staring at the computer screen in my North Hollywood apartment, seeing caved in Duluth streets and swimming seals, wondering if Moses intervened just to teach me a lesson.   Ninety percent of my relatives were dead.  There were only four rag tag Finlanders left of which three who seemed quite normal.  The other one was tarnished by Vietnam and his recessive anti-social gene surfaced just as I returned.  Two months after I moved here, I was shopping at the Salvation Army on West Superior Street for a snazzy outfit to wear to an East High School dance I was chaperoning through Americorps.  My older sister from San Francisco called in a panic, “John fell off the four wheeler and now he is presumed brain dead.”  I found out he was flying in from McGregor to St. Mary’s where he would be treated.  I refused to believe that my only close friend within 60 miles would not survive.  I visited him in St. Mary’s and prayed for God to intervene and prompt a miracle.  His son flew in from Alaska and within 48 hours it was determined he could not be salvaged.  He donated 3 organs to people who needed them.  He had given his life to everyone and now he gave 3 organs.  I was now short one close friend and still had not heard from the one they deemed the crazy Finn, the Vietnam War veteran.   I started making friends in the casino but one and a half years later, quit.  It was just a sideline bet to avoid the upcoming frozen winter and the inevitable silence of the long, winter nights.   My son had a new prosthetic –  X Box headphones permanently glued to his head in which he rode imaginary cars on split lane highways into rocky valleys, ghetto strewn neighborhoods, through graffiti stained walls.  I pretty much did not exist except to make dinner.  I started working 2 to 3 jobs to keep busy.  I also did 2 radio shows a week and worked on my screenplay piecemeal.  Moving back to Minnesota got me closer to nature in which I can see Chester Creek outside my window, but it did not bring me closer to myself.  Except my one year stint in the casino, I rarely went out.   I did join Toastmasters and gave five to ten minute speeches to a battery of a mostly female audience who were highly driven, disciplined and loved professional challenge.  I used to watch one of the speakers organize her notes and all her actions were so procedural.  I, the gypsy, was a misplaced Jack Kerouac about to recite Howl in a room full of neutrally dressed corporate climbers.  However, they were genuine.  I was the stranger.  Finally, after I quit gambling, I was able to face myself.  I joined gamblers anonymous and met people really dedicated to recovery.  People who had quit 8 to 10 years prior, were still attending.  I found unity and clarity by attending.  My church opened up the other valve of fulfillment by playing interesting, intellectually minded videos in Sunday school before church.  They even had a Lake Superior day and heralded nature.  I didn’t see Al Gore in the audience or any environmental gurus.  It just seemed to be a congregation that was able to commune and worship the stratosphere of Duluth.   Eighty year old women would smile on Sunday even if it was 20 degrees below zero.   After about two years, I noticed I have not really dated since I came to Duluth.  My closest proximity to a man was making small talk with the laundry mat owner.   There was also a black jack dealer that captured my heart.   It didn’t seem to bother me.  I was streamlining in intellectualism reading Thomas Merton and Albert Camus and was too busy to notice.   However, the slow paced culture of Minnesota did force me to challenge myself and decide what really made me happy.  Movies and book didn’t seem to cut it totally and I had to find a way to be fulfilled.   When I joined a gym, I realized that special element to keep one motivated butterflied and freed my soul.   I now swim four times a week and chase the old ghost of my former running days down the pool lane in my aqua socks.  I may be chubby but I haven’t given up.   Being middle age means that sometimes things do slow down even if I am working 70 hour weeks.  It means really finding yourself.   I live in a country where I have the luxury to survive, not go hungry and become “deep” and enriched.   With those advantages, I have overcome loneliness by just being grateful.  Except on those sub twenty zero days when I swear like a sailor as I drive behind someone going 30 mph because that’s what Duluthians do.   No matter the zip code, I will always be a gypsy but I paused long enough for my son to attend the same high school for four years so he doesn’t have to combat the urban streets of L.A. and he can have friends from well rounded families who invite him for supper with names like Johan Johnson and teach him colloquial Minnesota lingo. You betcha, I made the right choice.