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Sunday, July 5, 2015

What are the right words to say? What are the right thoughts to think?

Is it my life's work to tell you how I feel?  No, but it sure takes the sting off.

Lord, how many are my foes!
    How many rise up against me!
Many are saying of me,
    “God will not deliver him.[b]
But you, Lord, are a shield around me,
    my glory, the One who lifts my head high.
I call out to the Lord,
    and he answers me from his holy mountain.
I lie down and sleep;
    I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.
I will not fear though tens of thousands
    assail me on every side.
Arise, Lord!
    Deliver me, my God!
Strike all my enemies on the jaw;
    break the teeth of the wicked

Some issues in life hit heavy, the ball slams into your gut and you are left numb for days.

That's how I feel about working at the DRW.  Even as I take a stance 1/4 mile, 1/2 mile or a full mile away, I feel like a ton of bricks fell on me in the middle of the night and I have been left suffocating.

No amount of fairy tales and kiss ass is going to remove the harm inflicted on me.  Yes, there may be healing but none of this would have happened if people had integrity to begin with.  What I mean by integrity is being on the up and up.  Like, Jane, this is what I want from you tonight.   

But in the swarm of confusion become the hostages of lies.  I am there like a servant obedient to a master and I get the lashes but few rewards.  I am pushed to the side by the already pre established preferences.  The editor tries to expand his horizons but then he squashes those lower on the food chain.  It's not a good feeling to be dispensable.    all 4 now.

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