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Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Individuality and the Blogosphere

What is the true value of blogging?  People randomly come across my stuff.  They have no particular interest in my life, they are just looking for a word or value definition so they can relate to what they are seeking.  If its knowledge, that's one thing.  If its something personal about my life, then maybe someone can get something out of it, but in actuality, they are just looking for a way to find their feelings, to solve their problems, they have no intimate interest in me or how my life came to be.  So that is the top layer of internet phoniness, instant gratification through random searches, hoping to find a solution to their paradoxical online life.

I found a website where I think the woman is some kind of editor or writer in her real life and she has like 2000 plus blogger followers.  Is that even possible on a website like this, which is a kind of lonely accolade to self?  The #Google #Blogger is truly a work of individuality, a subscription to all things self, a shrine to those things we like and adore.  Its not really necessary if anyone ever stumbles on our page.  If they do, more power to them, if they don't who give a shit.  This blog is a shrine to myself where it is not visible to every single Facebook stalker, ex boyfriend or lover stalker, etc.

There are a few examples where my blog has become a matter of attention.  A guy I dated named Joe Murphy, stalked my page over 50 times in a year cuz I used his email.  His classmate at some school found it and prompted him.  There was nothing on the post that consequential.  Since he stalked it so much, I changed the post from time to time to leave him messages.  I made a game out of it.  He was a drinker whose job got in jeopardy due to drinking & excessive texting.  I was disappointed he lost his job, being that he was a foreigner in LA.  We had a few pleasant encounters but I could not remedy his pain nor could his g.f.

I think Paul stalked my page 1 to 2 times but its hard to say.  I had days when I got 15 hits but now I can't even remember why.  I then wrote a poem about my ex husband and titled it "death of a husband" and I got five to ten hits from all over the United States, apparently from grieving widows.  It was a spiritual death between my husband and I, not a literal death.  Our daughter had died and our marriage unraveled.  By the way, Alexis, our daughter, would be 22 today.  Happy Birthday, Alexis, my dear.

So people stalk our page due to buzz words or in search of their unending emotion, but what ultimate purpose does blogging serve?  Nothing in my opinion.  It is a dull curiosity for us to stalk other people we simply do not know, their pages, to see how they arrange their page, how they emphasize what is important, how they artistically demonstrate their existence.  If you click on next blog, Google arranges it so that people who are in alignment to you (Like if you are a Christian) can be seen in sequential display.  Keep stalking and you may find a blogger soulmate in whom you can identify with, and it may even make your day.  You may find a Bible verse, photography, a confessional, a watershed and then maybe the blog or person can become real, and you are not just a random internet stalker.

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