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Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Things I will never know about "The Elder Sage" REVISED

Did I like him or convince myself to like him? Was he a seasonal casting line in my holiday indulgence? One extra snap of the wrist and I unpreparedly sunk my fate into deeper conversation that would ultimately retain its shallowness? Would he laugh at my uncompleted set of dishes or the orange plate with the castigated spoon? Could he eat dinner in my apartment without defining the economic or contextual meaning? Would he acknowledge that Bill Clinton is gifted in one non animated moment or that he does not hold all the secrets of the world in his gray nebuli? Could he have a conversation that didn't end up divided with one person on one side and himself in his pore thought out cage? How often does he let his hair down or is he like those hunched over seniors that gave way to a well protected reputation forsaking a vivacious woman who could make him truly happy? Will he have to prove himself right beyond reasonable doubt for what to eat, whom to trust, where to put your money, where not to, what social investments can never prosper, what wars to back, what conflict to retreat from including his own inner demons? Will jazz and blues be his ultimate sexual substitute...revealed thru YouTube music videos he surfs at night? When in his father's old neighborhood, does he know his true, memory driven self? Or is he beyond the general stereo typing that the Black community naturally stigmatizes itself with? Is he Tyler Perry or Langston Hughes? Is he Spike Lee pre conditioned or evangelized by the blood of the Black Church Christ? In his dark deepest moments only he can answer those questions. It is only he that will share them with his own reflection and departed throne of self.

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